Rain Pours Through {his broken heart}

- RAIN POURS THROUGH - { HIS BROKEN HEART }
They exchanged not a single word as he carried the last box out. It seemed the hurting inside should have made him shout. He was still moving in shock after their years she killed his dream. And he just faded away too to proud to scream. At night he holds his pillow oh so tight. And prays when he returns it will all be right. Then he cries out loud and just can’t stop his time ticking away like a bombs clock. He watches the rain wash through - his broken heart.	The memories are all he’s got felt so sure that she’d never go He thinks that maybe her love was just a show. She’s now afraid he’ll come back just to get his revenge. But as he leaves he’s telling her there is too much for them to mend. At night he holds his pillow oh so tight. The rage in his soul he must fight. And then he cries out loud and just can’t stop. His time ticking away like a bombs clock. He watches the rain pour through - his broken heart. all “the pain” returning again. one more try gone with the wind. he watches the rain pour through - his broken heart.
2012.09.24 @ 0012

Nothing More To Lose ( III )

- NOTHING MORE TO LOSE ( III ) -

Free -
Nothing More Left To Lose.
Nothing We Want To Do.
Nothing More We Can Lose.

free to walk away -
     ( say good-bye )
free to wonder why -
     ( and to cry )
there is nothing worth "the pain".
we have the right to chose,
and we still lose.

We’re Free -
Nothing Left To Lose.
Nothing We Can Do.
Nothing More We Can Lose.

free to carry on -
     ( and believe )
free to be happy -
     ( a reprieve )
there was no better time than now.
whispers our inside voice.
we can't lose.

We're Free -
     ( Free, Free )
Free To Do What We Want To.
Choose Our Own Destiny.
Nothing Left We Can Lose.

               2012.09.21 @ 0329

INVISIBLE

- INVISIBLE - if your heart can stay unbroken, then you’re a lucky man. ‘cos it never, never, ever has for us. in the promise of forever, lies the heaven of the heart. and it’s likely you will never find us there. - - - + - - -
WE'VE HAD TOO MANY YEARS -       OF PAIN AND TEARS -       RARELY A HAPPY MAN. JUST ADDED ONE MORE -       WITH A FROZEN CORE -       WE DO THE BEST WE CAN. WE TOOK OUR CHANCE -       AT THE COUPLES DANCE -       ALL ENDS WITH OUT STARTS. OUT OF SIGHT -       MIND - OR LIGHT -       IT ALL JUST FEEL APART. AND WHEN WE’RE AROUND, THEY DON’T SEE US . . . WE ARE JUST INVISIBLE. ALMOST 46 -       AND IN A FIX -       LIVING WITH OUR HAND. SEEING PRETTY GIRLS -       LIVING IN DADDY’S WORLD -       IT’S ALL JUST WAVES AND SAND. FEELING CONFUSED -       AND SLIGHTLY USED -       BUT THAT’S JUST WHAT WE ARE. SEARCHING FOR SPARKS -       IN THE DARK -       WON’T GET US VERY FAR. WE COULD GO AWAY. WE COULD LEAVE HERE . . . WE COULD BE INVISIBLE.	WE KNOW WE’RE SICK -       WHEN WE LIKE THE KICK -       OF DEALING WITH THE TEARS. LIKE READING A BOOK -       WITH THE EXACT SAME LOOK -       OR BRAGGING ABOUT HER KNEE’S. IT’S ALL WE’VE EVER HEARD -       MEANINGLESS WORDS -       FROM WHAT WE’VE HEARD BEFORE. THE ONLY WAY -       SANITY CAN STAY -       IS TO NOT OPEN THE DOOR. WE COULD GO AWAY - WE COULD LEAVE HERE . . . WE SHOULD BE INVISIBLE. WE WOULD GO INSANE - IF WE BELIEVED LOVE . . . SO WE JUST STAY INVISIBLE.
2012.09.20 @ 0449

It Wasn't Love

      - IT WASN’T LOVE -


He begged her
  Not to leave.
    But she had her reasons.
He knew she’d hurt him
   If she stayed.
    Call it continued treason.
It wasn’t love -
  That brought her to him.
It wasn’t love -
  He couldn’t keep her.
He couldn’t hold on -
  When she’d never felt
     Loved in her soul.

And now he's
  Sitting here.
    Alone with his feelings.
He finds he’s not
  Satisfied.
    Now that he’s finally healing.
It wasn’t love -
  That brought her to him.
It wasn’t love -
  He couldn’t keep her.
He couldn’t hold on -
  When she’d never felt
     Loved in her soul.

Each night that
  He’s hunting.
    For skirt wearing teasers.
He’s always successful
   When he tries.
    For one night of pleasure.
It wasn’t love -
  That brought her to him.
It wasn’t love -
  That’ll make her go.
It isn’t love -
  That he is seeking.
He can’t hold on -
  When love is simply
     Not in his soul.

2012.09.19 @ 0400

As The World Turned

                                  - As The World Turned -

When he was eighteen, he had a girl named Karen. He called her Kare - because he did. But the world turned - and she no longer kared. He was twenty two. Then he had Amber, he knew it would be short. So he didn't call her anything. And the world turned. Then he had Laurie, he called her Lar - -for no reason. The world turned and it was over before it began. Then there was a long run of which he remembers only one. Tall, statuesque Jennifer. He called her Jenni - But didn't try - remembering the turning. He was twenty three when Angela found him. He called her Angel- because she was. And the world turned before he knew it. For nine months he waited. He sat alone and watched. The world turning. Loved no one and was happy. He was twenty four when along came Tamara K. He knew he was in trouble, she said "I do" while looking at the judge. She chose the scarlet letter. He saw the world turn. and foolishly tried to stop it

Then Angela came back. He called her Angel again - -because he thought she was. But one year later- she collected a scarlet alphabet - - the world turned. He wasn't looking - and along came Wendy. She never had a special name. She gave him a son, she later stole away. She also wore a scarlet letter. For one whole year he had no one but his children. He lived, and waited he watched the world turn on others. And then he started a run, that had a few high lights. Ashley was called Ash - but wasn't over her ex . . . So the world turned, turning everything to Ashes. Brandi was amazing - he called her angel & the one. But she was cheating on him - with her husband and one other. Tannath was a model, with golden eyes. He called her Tan - but then she ran, and the world turned again. He's on another run, after the last one he called wife. He’s not getting close enough to call anyone, anything. He thinks he has finally learned. He thinks he's wrong. 'Cos he still can see the world turning.

2012.09.19 @ 0330

& THEN

       -  & THEN  -

we want to know
    who you really are.
we pray it's a chance
    to heal our scars.
"we" are so close
    but afraid to start.
please don't hold back
    you could tear us apart.
"we" are trapped
    & don't think "we're" able.
make "ourselves" act so strong,
    "we" are so unstable.
& Then -
We Long For Your Touch
& Then -
You're So Afraid To Give In.
"We're" So Unstable.

we want to learn
    all there is of you.
all we know so far
    you're afraid of love too.
so much alike
    in "our" approach to life.
fight so hard to simplify
    & avoiding another knife.
"we" are trapped
    by pain from the past.
both wearing a brave face
    afraid happiness won't last.
& Then -
You Long For Our Touch
& Then -
You're Afraid To Give In
"We're" So Unstable -
Afraid It Won't Last


2012.09.18 @ 0057

Losing To Insanity (again)

- LOSING TO INSANITY -
              ( again )

someone once said,
 you'll light up the sky.
it's all there in your head,
 we're crazy after all.
breaking us down,
 we're only a no one.
running from trust -
running from us -
and though loves always our undoing -
we're losing to insanity
again

someone once said,
 forever has a time limit.
so we open up our head,
 when crazy comes to town.
breaking us down,
 no one is an innocent.
blame it on the moon -
blame comes all to soon -
that though loves always confusing -
we're losing our insanity
again

someone once said,
 believe in your two sides.
they're both in your head,
 and waiting for the ride.
breaking us down,
 ah we once had everything.
breaking our own law -
breaking down our flaws -
and though love seems so fleeting -
we're losing to insanity
Again

2012.09.14 @ 0230

- DESERVE THIS -

        - DESERVE THIS -

all your pain -
 the tattoo of your heart,
  your feelings on your sleeve.
we can feel -
 the fear you hold inside,
  in love you can't believe.
there's a flame -
 a famine in you soul,
  an aching to feel trust.
can't you see -
 that everything you seek,
  can be found with you and us.
When Your Fears
All Fall Apart
When Your Walls Come
Tumbling Down
You May Not Believe It
But You Deserve It.

break your chains -
 your fate, your tragedy,
  and fall into our arms.
just let go -
 believe us when we say,
  we'll keep you from all harm.
feed the flames -
 stirring in your heart,
  awakening desire.
you will see -
 that everything you fear,
  will be burned by "our" fire.
When Your Fears
All Melt Away
And Your Walls Come
Crumbling Down
You Will Finaly know It
You Deserve This.

2012.09.07 @ 0220

Fresh Ink

                    FRESH INK

we yell at the wind,
  though the wind won't help us fly at all -
    our back's to the wall.
curse at the sun,
it tears our heart and breaks us as we run -
    we run, and we run!
behind her smile,
  there's danger in the promise that it sold -
    we'll never get old.
life's fantasy,
  to be locked up and still to think we're free -
    we're free, we're free!
so live for today.
  pray tomorrow never comes.
   die now, die now.
we can see the writing on the wall.
  die now, die now.
    no one can stop the fall.

well they say that life's a carousel
spinning too fast, we tried to ride it well
the worlds a never end stream of Queens
Who blind our eyes and crush our dreams
just Heaven and Hell.
she told us black was really white
the moon is just a sun at night
and then trapping us in sugar walls
blinding our eyes as the pieces fall
just Heaven and Hell.
fool, fool!
love is just a cancer!
fool, fool!
we knew the answer!
fool, fool
Die now.


2012.09.06 @ 0245

We're Just Gonna Rain / Slipping Away

  We're Just Gonna Rain / Slipping Away

sometimes we wish we could die by dawn
and sometimes we're alive as fire
but lately we feel like we're just gonna rain
and it goes over, and over, and over again,

too many flames, too many bridges to burn
and love's as fragile as paper
oh, how we need to be free of this pain
but it goes over, and over, and over, and over again

and sometimes we cry so lost and alone
and for the dreams that turned into ashes
but lately we feel like we're just gonna rain
and it goes over, and over, and over, and over again . . .

                            ---{+}---

Slipping away, we're just a heartbeat from disaster
Nothing could make us stay, close our eyes and we'll be gone
Turn the page, they've all started another story
Slipping away, slipping away, time to move along
No reason to stay
when we're slipping away

We take a look at ourself, we've been running in a circle
Round and round we go, we're a start without an end
Hope to survive, far from the city of angels
Running away, slipping away, right behind the spear
Slipping away
Nobody to pay
look out, 'cause we're slipping away

The Rock, the hard place, and a heart made of glass
A future without a past, no road to take us back
Gone with the wind, we won't question our direction
Running away, slipping away, we can find the sun
Slipping away
Slipping away
Got nobody to pay
And we're slippin' away

No more running in a circle
It's time to let it go
Round and round, over and over
A start without an end
So we're slipping away
Like we're just gonna rain.


2012.09.05 @ 0325

Dirty Boy

                Dirty Boy

You came walking in like a vision,
    every school boy dream.
Ooh, you could be our teacher,
    ooh, you could be our queen
All of the boys, “we” stopped talking,
    you came walking through.
One by one you shot them down,
    ‘til you got to us.

We've got no secrets.
We've got no clue.
And all we really wanna do.
Is get next to you.
You know what the world's about.
And we'll be your dirty boy.

You know all Victoria’s secrets,
    sweat slicked skin doesn’t need perfume.
In your tats and lace,
    with your untouchable face.
You're so cold and chic,
    you're so completely unique
But when it comes to us,
    don't think that you're immune.

We've got no answers.
We've got no doubts.
We know you wanna show us baby.
What the world's about.
Don't treat us like we broke your toy.
And we'll be your dirty boy.

We've got no secrets.
We've got no doubts.
But all we really wanna do.
Is rock with you.
Show us what your world's about.
And we'll be your dirty boy

2012.09.02 @ 0330

What We Don't Know

          What We Don't Know


if all the everything would just stop
we could steal a moment to collect our thoughts
if all the everything would just stand still
we could maybe hide how lost we feel
we should say what we hear
we should let our self fear
we should make our self clear
watch our self as we fall apart
standing where the ending starts
now we find we've lost our mind
we’ll fake what we don't know
we never asked to be let go
until this second here right now
we never thought we would sink this low
we should say what we think
we should just let our self sink
we should fall over the brink
watching our self as we fall apart
falling where the ending starts
as we find we've lost our mind
we fake what we don't know
so this is how we fall apart
so this is how the ending starts
when our head betrayed our heart
we faked what we didn't know
cause all we are is what’s been done
all we are is how quickly we run
and all we are is what we are
we should stay just where we are
we should hope this doesn’t go too far
we should hide our mental scar
so now we slowly fall apart
this is where new beginnings start
whenever life crushes our heart
we fake what we don't know
and as our doubts begin again
no real answers find us in the end
so in the meantime we'll pretend
and fake what we don't know


2012.09.01 @ 0325